Work-Aholic

My name is Amanda Nelson and I'm a workaholic. I never realized that I was one, because surrounding me were my teacher friends working just as long and as hard as I was. But my eyes became open when I heard this woman's story on the radio. She said, "I used to work as a sales associate for an accounting firm and my work defined my identify. However, now I am a stay at home mom and feel that I have no sense of identity anymore." I thought to myself, "how sad is that women whose whole life was her work, oh wait Amanda, that is you, your identity is wrapped up in being a teacher. It's what you think, breathe and live. This became disturbing to me because I don't want to end up like that woman, depressed because now her identity is mother and that is not enough. So, as a result of this epiphany I have decided to set a 70 hour limit on work this week starting today and lasting until Saturday. I'm off to a great start with 0 hours clocked in for today. However, I have conferences on Thursdays that last until 7 that could create a bit of a problem. I'm going to strive to trust the Lord through all of this and know that he will provide where I can not. At the end of the day, whatever I can not finish will be covered by God's Grace.

How the Debate Just Like My School

While I sit here and watch Obama and McCain bash each other on Live Television and Tom Brocroft reminding them of debate rules, I can't help but be reminded of how similar this debate is just like my school. These two men are too busy pointing the fingers and someone else instead of work together and solve problems EFFECTIVELY. I have parents, colleagues, and administrations who want to talk, complain and point fingers instead of meet the needs of these students. They want to holler and hear their own voice when nothing important is coming out. I desire for my students to learn academically, socially and emotionally. I wonder which candidate really cares about the needs of my students? I'm still thinking.....

Burned Out!

I've always heard the saying that most teachers quit within the first five years of teaching. I'm beginning to understand why. I always hear that the first year of teaching is the hardest and if I get through that, then I would be fine. However, I feel that the second year is even harder. I'm always getting frusterated with parents calling and complaining, not to mention 38 students to work with. Everyday I come home exhausted and tired, but I am too stressed out to actually sleep. Instead I stay up working until bed time leaving very little down time. I'm beginning to wornder if I made the right decision in choosing a career that would drain so much of me. I feel that I have very little to give when I get home and that makes me sad for the home I need to take care of, the husband I am called to care for, and the simple joys that make me smile. But something that I learned this week at Sunday school is that deremination is a virtue and I am strong enough to finish the race. Paul did not give up when it got hard, so I will not either. I am going to keep my eyes on the prize and finish strong.

Great Sadness

On September 25, 2008 my grandma, Mary Lou Moore, went to spend eternity with her Savior. This was extremely difficult for me to hear not because she is in heaven with Jesus but because she gave up on life. Her husband, my grandpa, passed away on December 25, 2007 and she was never able to fully live life without him. Being married for over 50 years, his absence was too much to handle. Now, her depression led to several medical problems, that doctors could not take on. The Lord has brought me through several emotional, physical and psychological phases to be where I am today. I am grateful for the life she led and the memories I have shared with her. My grandma and I have always been very close. I'm the oldest grandaughter and with that came certain treasures she entrusted just to me. My most prized possession is her autobiographhy which she wrote me all throughout my college years. She would write me installments of her life like her childhood, married life, etc. I pray that the Lord will continue working on me as the days come to help me to see his plan. I will always remember you Grandma and I will make sure others will as well.

Beautiful Fall Day

I can not believe how long it has been since I have last blogged. Today was a wonderful day because I had no obligations. I woke up at 8 am and felt completely rested and ready for the day. Then, I had breakfast and spent some time with the Lord. I feel God keeps trying to teach me over and over that his love is enough and covers all wounds, hurts and sins. I am not the creator, so I do not have the right to judge. I'm glad that I have a beloved who cares about me. I spent the day upstairs in my office (or as I called it, my very own coffee shop) working on school stuff. I listened to my own music, sipped on my diet coke and went to town. I worked right off my to do list. It felt nice to have an afternoon of work and solitude. Larry rewarded me for working all afternoon by taking me to Outback for dinner. It was a great day.